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The Pink [Psycho] Herring

the interesting thing about my car is now it's pink

So I am now the proud owner of a pink car. Ok, let's not be melodramatic here; my old one painted pink. I mean, what do you say? [..are you fucking blind? - well no, you don't want to hurt his feelings so instead you say: Fuck…and think, well this guy is even more fucked up than I thought; I thought he was only really fucked up before]

It grows on you after a while. The pink I mean.

Adam said: it would look quite cool if it was green.
But it's not Adam. It's fucking pink.

at this point things didn't look too bad

It's already been noticed, I try to sneak in, but I can't. So that's the start for a different season in New Zealand, isn't it? No more Mystery River X now, then? “Where's Paul fishing, today?” “Well I saw this fucking pink truck here, so that would be my guess.”

Rebecca - who also had something to do in this - and no small part either - just asked me what's my favourite bit?
“Good question Bex, Can I think about my answer? - it's not the wheel hubs, I know that. That bit I only quite like. It may not also be the fact that it is fucking pink either. That may not be one of my favourite bits either... Why do you ask?”

no shit..

Deano thought it was funny. Said that he more he thought about it the better the idea sounded. The worst part about it is that he thinks he's done me a favour and actually wished me a happy birthday today. It's not even my birthday, Deano. When is yours, by the way?

complete with pink princess seat covers and pink fluffy diceSo I guess I have the choice: to unleash this “present” or paint it black.

Will I get laid more? Well yes, of course; I'll get laid lots more, only maybe not by women. Will I catch more fish? Well actually I asked myself this question first. No, no I won't catch more fish.

Is it a good thing? Well I know that it's given me one of the best laughs in years. If all I have to do is walk around the truck to piss myself then yep, it's very funny. Obviously it's not my first choice in colour. Me, I'd go for something more subtle, a forest green or a navy blue perhaps; pink, I think, would have been my last choice. But since Deano has chosen pink - for fuck's sake - then I have to ask myself a few things. Why pink, and not canary yellow for example?

Deano obviously is colour blind.

So the question is how do I handle Hechte Pete - the Eastern European body-builder, who is named after a fearsome fish, who will be joining me this month, for a month of fishing and living in the truck? Will this be an unexpected problem? Does Hechte Peter like pink?

one of my favourite bits actually

Obviously I'm going to thrash it harder now. I'm not sure how exactly, but I'll really have to fuck it up to place my stamp back on it. You don't notice the dents any more, not now that it's pink.

not so sure about this bit though

Deano, what you have done here, is not just some simple, bucket-of-water practical joke- instead we have a global audience. Our global audience expects retaliation. And they know that good all-round, fair but devastating, retaliation doesn't happen immediately or overnight, but takes time. We have time. And when you least expect it, I'll be there, wishing you a “happy birthday” too. So that's something to look forward to. It's good to see you again, brother.


Nov' 06

Happy birthday, Paul. Thanks dude but it's not actually my birthday.

Essential Bush Skills

The start of any flytying good flytying sequence involves squirting The Light of Apgai on your polyprops
Both alarm and curiousity set in when the polyprops start melting
Putting the lid back on the jar to stop *that* happening again
The flytying proper is underway
Notice the composure, that's true class that is
A difficult bit, you can tell that from the vacant expression
Essential bush skills: the third hand
Notice my hat here, it's quite daring
Snip, snip
I'm not quite sure what I'm doing here, but it's cool
Trimming an oversize hackle that appears to have become trapped in the whip finnish manoevre
Delicate precision work, the hallmark of any good flytyer
Sheep make good flies too

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