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Ronan's report

Monday 8th July, 2013

What a great name for a fly that is! I love those old names for flies; Thunder and Lightning, Coachman, Teal Blue and Silver, and then there's Whickham's Fancy, Peter Ross, even Partridge and Orange which somehow all make you think, "this sport has history!" And of course, Tup's Indispensable, which still makes me laugh even now! Silver Doctor, Zulu - where would we be without these flies? To catch a fish on a Silver Doctor is to be a part of something much larger than our youthful age, of whatever that is!

And despite being a man, and therefore possessing virtually no memory whatsoever, I can tell you exactly how to tie these and many hundreds of other flies, many of which I don't even use and some of which I never have! Birthdays? No I don't remember. Phone numbers? Get out of here! The dressing materials of a Silver Invicta? You've come to the right place! I can even tell you how to fish the thing.

Anyway, I'm currently in a Thunder and Lightning storm. We have them here in Hungary. Yesterday while bike training I cleverly managed to avoid two, but ended up cycling through another two, one of which was being particularly destructive, blowing up trees and scattering them across the road in front of me. I like Thunder Storms. In fact I love them! Even from a small age I can remember being fascinated by their force. Some of my youngest memories are of watching them, in Scotland of all places, in South Africa. And then more recently in Australia and the US. But the best - ie the most regularly destructive ones - are here in Hungary. And they generally circle Latohegy. Yes it could be God.

Power flicker - no problems; headlamp attached to nose. The great thing about being a flyfisherman is that I always know where my headlamp is, unless of course I got drunk the night before. (It happens, ladies - completely the wrong link by the way, couldn't find the one where Tom got drunk one night and lost both our headlamps).

Right now I'm "tapering". This means that I don't train as hard as possible, but instead start to hold back - this is Ironman Preparation, which is now 20 days away. "Tapering" will make me moody - be warned on the Board: Who knows who I will nuke? And then invite back as Moderator? It could even be me.

I'm pretty fit right now; I live in Lycra. I've been everywhere in Lycra. Everywhere apart from Tesco, but even Tesco is not safe. I've been to the gas station, the post office. The village shop only knows me in Lycra. Pubs, bars - all Lycra. I get up, I don Lycra. Hell I would be wearing Lycra now if I wasn't naked. This is all part of my training programme.

After the Ironman I will maintain and even improve upon this fitness. Camouflage Lycra? Could be a Sexyloops first. I particularly like cycle shorts with a naked bum print instead of plain black (I tried to find a Google link for this but got distracted). Anyway I'm thinking of getting a pair of these. If they could do a crotch area with a large penis then this would be even better. As flyfishers we have a lot to learn from these guys, but they can learn from us too.


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